Wednesday, May 13, 2009

I Hate Sexy Food!

Even if you don't own a television, if you are ever within spitting distance of one (and they are everywhere) for just fifteen minutes you are bound to see a Sexy Food commercial. No, that is not an actual brand. It's just a dumb commercial trend that attempts to use (female) sex appeal to sell food (to men).

There is the infamous Paris Hilton/ Carl's Jr. hamburger commercial that has since been banned. If you haven't seen it (hell no, I'm not linking a YouTube video here) it is basically bad porn in which Paris washes a car in some sort of fetish gear bikini and at the end she scarfs down a burger bigger than she is.

Arby's is really going overboard with their sexy food campaign. There is one in which a man, who we see lying in bed, has talked his girlfriend (or wife if it makes you feel better) into dressing up as an Arby's employee for his birthday, complete with tray of food. When she walks in with the bad porn music kicking in he springs a red cartoon Arby's "hat-on" over his head- complete with "boing" sound just in case you didn't get the implication.

Their latest includes a woman licking some kind of sauce from herself. It's really sleazy.

The latest offender I've seen is from Quizno's, in which the sandwich oven (who has inexplicably become some sort of horny HAL 9000) says "Put it in me, Scott" and "Say it sexy." Hey, at least it's not a scantily clad women this time.

So, after these observations you may conclude that:
  1. I watch too much television. Yes, as in my view any is too much. It gives me a headache to be around it anymore. But I actually only intentionally view one show- Lost, which I haven't even seen in weeks. I heard most of these commercials from the next room when Target-Demographic-White-Male-Fast-Food-Consumer, oops, I mean Jeremy was watching his wrestling (man-soaps).
  2. I'm looking for perverse messages because I am an angry feminist who likes to meddle and doesn't want men to have any fun- and hot chicks eating hamburgers is fun, dammit! Well, true as the statement may be- the feminist part anyway, I really don't care. Just an observation. I wonder what would happen though if the talky-box people started making commercials like these aimed towards women. That would be interesting.
  3. I over-analyze things. Maybe. Oh well.


Laoch of Chicago said...

The power of the subconscious is strong.

Something Happened Somewhere Turning said...

That's funny, I was just telling Lois that you've been MIA and then I looked at my screen and there you were. :)
I totally agree. And that quizno's commercial is really disturbing. It really gives me the creeps.

*mary* said...

Laoch- it is indeed!

Beaux- I have been MIA, sorry. My poor baby has had the diaper rash from Hades. My poor girl.

Evil Twin's Wife said...

I think the one I find least appealing is a Hardee's commercial with the Thickburger and some chick is sitting there, scarfing it down with her legs splayed and then she uses her finger to scoop up ? (ketchup) or some sauce from her calf and then eats it. If I was eating something that messy, it would be all over my FACE, not on my legs. LOL.

*mary* said...

ETW- I know! I think that is the one I mentioned above, mistakenly calling it an Arby's commercial. That one is just too much. No damn sandwich is that good! ;)

mary evelyn said...

i don't think you're over-analyzing anything. have you seen the peta commercials that were supposed to play during the super bowl but didn't? they were basically attractive women making love to vegetables. i'm a vegetarian, but i sure don't make out with my broccoli, i mean come on.

the cucumber on the other hand.......

eww, gross. jk.

Chelle said...

Not only that- Those women don't eat, let alone fast food. So here I am all decked out in my leather and quarter pounders.

It didn't work the way I thought it was going to, is what I'm saying.

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