Thursday, May 14, 2009

Gee Thanks, Random Pessimist!

Today I was pulling Violet around the yard in her red wagon when some guy I do not know happened to be walking by. He says hello, I say hello back. Normal stuff here in suburbia.

But then from the depths of his tortured and lonely soul erupted strange words, that actually passed the filter in his brain saying "acceptable" and then came out of his mouth, landing on my fragile ears:

"She'll be pulling you before long. It'll happen before you know it."
I do believe he meant pushing- as in wheelchair.

So yes folks, even total strangers see me and think to themselves, "Hmmm, I bet that frazzled lady with the unbrushed hair, broccoli on her shirt and the rowdy kid there probably needs knocked down a peg or two. I'm a'gonna to tell her that she's gonna die, AND much sooner than she thinks. Wait- not morbid enough. I got it! I'll let her know that before she shuffs off her mortal husk she's also gonna be handicapped and forced to rely on her offspring to push her cratchety old ass around, too! That oughta fix her!"

You KNOW that was this random douchebag's weirdo's thought process. Why else would anyone feel compelled to say such a bizarre thing to a perfect stranger?

I should have said to him something equally inexplicable. I should've screamed "The crow flies at midnight, Poncho!" Or perhaps, "Your mother never loved you!" Hell, I suspect that one may be true. I hope this good ol' boy wasn't meaning no harm and he's just one of many socially awkward locals who say "off" things. It happens frequently.

If he would have phrased it any more poorly he simply would have walked by and shouted, "You. Old and Dead. Soon."

Ugh.
Something about me attracts the weirdos.

6 comments:

Annika said...

I am laughing because I can absolutely see this happening to me.

Sidd said...

I think his mother lives here, and just told me the other day that my sweater was basically garbage and I should throw it away. (See my blog entry on that one a few days ago.) Mama Pajama, where do we get these people!

Evil Twin's Wife said...

I would just take that as a strange way of saying "They grow up too fast", which all of us moms hear about 200 kabillion times in our lives.

Something Happened Somewhere Turning said...

I'm with ETW. That's how I see it.
Have a nice weekend.
This might be a bad time to say that your blog eats my blog. (Everytime I log off a new window keeps opening up over and over again until I finally have to reboot -- very weird) I can't figure it out.
I'm going to reboot now. :)

Constructive Attitude said...

I mean this in the nicest way possible, Mary:

Maybe he thought u were Violet's Grandma. Thats what I thought he was implying.

*mary* said...

CA- You're gonna get it! I just FEEL like her grandma, but don't quite look it...yet. Give me a year.

Post a Comment