Remember this character? Yes, Chiru, our beloved pet chinchilla.
Yeah well, I was just petting him as I walked by his cage and this frisky little Jack-of-clubs mounted my hand! I'll never see the spot between my index and middle fingers quite the same now. I feel so violated. What turned my sweet little chinchilla into a drunken chimney sweep, trying to cop a feel?
I don't even know what category of creepy this gets filed under.
Bestiality? No, I didn't initiate it. Incest? I considered him my fur kid, until this. Attempted rodent rape? Just plain Icky?
I need counseling.